Raw, Week 4 March 2017

Raw opens with John Cena swaggering through the halls with a shit eating grin on his face, nodding at techs cheerfully. He comes across Daniel Bryan and offers him a huge smile.


Cena – Hey! Good Evening Boss! Big night tonight huh? Lots to do. Lot of… loose ends.


Bryan smiles back. He doesn’t look concerned, and that bothers Cena.


Cena – What?


Bryan – I have good news for you John. Since you worked so hard last week, making title matches and tag matches and changing the landscape of Wrestlemania, I thought you deserved some rest. So I’m giving you the night off.


Cena – What?


Bryan nods to the group of security guards who are suddenly behind Cena.


Bryan – Have a good one. Bye John.


Daniel walks off chuckling, and Cena is herded out by security.



“BOOM! BOOM! BOOM-BA-BOOM! BOOM!” The show starts with an impressive opening of pyro, before the lights are raised and several sections of the excited crowd are shown waving various signs. The focus then switches to the announce table where Joey Styles and William Regal introduce and hype tonight’s show.


Joey – Welcome everyone to Monday Night Raw. I’m Joey Styles, joined as always by hardcore legend Mick Foley, and our new broadcast colleague William Regal.


Regal – Pleasure to be here lads. Let’s crack on. See what young Daniel has in mind for cleaning up the mess Cena left him last week.


Joey – We’ll hopefully be finding out how Daniel Bryan plans to fix the problems of Wrestlemania here tonight, but we have match first…



In a decent match, Naomi defeated Bayley in 8:39 by pinfall with a Nightfalls.



Chris Jericho saunters down to the ring, determined.


Jericho – I want to talk to Shelton Benjamin. That idiot cost me my place in the Intercontinental Ladder Match, and even though Rusev is out of the match now the other IDIOT Daniel Bryan refuses to put me in his place. So it’s time I put Shelton Benjamin in HIS place! Get out here!


Shelton does just that, coming on out to the ring. They eye each other up, and Jericho slowly raises the mic to his face.


Jericho – You. Me. Wrestlemania, Falls Count Anywhere.


Shelton snatches the microphone, looks at Jericho, and raises it to his face.


Shelton – You’re on.


He shoves the mic back into Jericho’s chest and leaves.


Joey – Oh my God! That’s HUGE! Chris Jericho versus Shelton Benjamin in a Fall Count Anywhere Match for Wrestlemania! I thought we had the entire card on lock already!


Mick – It’s a five hour show Joey, and there’s ALWAYS space for a contest between two of the best competitors in the history of the business.


Regal – Shelton and Jericho haven’t met one on one since they both came back to the company, but they’ve been hassling each other like crazy. This match is going to be tremendous.


Joey – Well speaking of tremendous, next up is a match made last week. The Universal Tag Team champions reDragon demanded to meet the new kids on Raw, Guerillas of Destiny, as revenge for taking out Big Day and stealing the tag title belts.



In a bout that had sub-par wrestling and little heat, reDRagon defeated Guerillas of Destiny in 7:52 when Kyle O’Reilly defeated Tonga Roa by pinfall.


Tama Tonga was the weak link, struggling to keep up with everyone else’s in-ring performance.


Guerillas of Destiny snatch up the belts once again before reDragon can retrieve them, and peg it up the ramp.


Tama Tonga – reDragon! You beat us tonight, but can you do it again? If you want these belts back, fight for them! Wrestlemania! GoD v reDragon for the Tag Team Titles. You win, you get them back. We win… well you know what happens.


Bobby and Kyle look at each other, shrug, and answer together;


reDragon – Fine.



Next on Raw, Daniel Bryan has put together some matches from the IC Title Ladder match competitors, and first up is Big E Langston versus Damien Sandow!


In a bout that had great wrestling and good heat, Big E defeated Damien Sandow in 11:33 by submission.


Jay Lethal is backstage with Daniel Bryan. He asks for his contractually obligated rematch for the European Title against Rusev tonight! Bryan says unfortunately Rusev is still off with his wife, but Lethal is right. He is owed a rematch for the EU Title. Bryan says Lethal must be feeling pretty stupid, hitching his wagon to the Cenation when he had the chance to get out. But if he’s seen the error of his ways after that beating Barrett threw on him last week, maybe there’s hope for him.


Bryan makes it official… Jay Lethal is back in the match at Wrestlemania, making it a Fatal 5Way Elimination for the European Title. Lethal is happy enough, shakes Bryan’s hand and leaves.


Joey – Yet more Wrestlemania intrigue here folks, and another loose end tied up by General Manager Daniel Bryan.


Mick – Something else Daniel has done is book this next match. Seems like everyone hates Christian, and no matter who’s in charge be it Heyman or Cena or Bryan, the former World Heavyweight Champion is in the crosshairs.


Joey – That’s right. Next up Christian is in a match with his tag team partner Edge’s Wrestlemania opponent, Goldust!


In a good match, Christian Cage defeated Goldust in 13:19 by pinfall following interference from Edge, who came to the ring and cuffed Goldust’s ankle to the ring post, making it impossible for him to kick out after a Killswitch from Christian.


Edge gets in the ring and the two partners celebrate, with Edge dangling the ECW title in Goldust’s screaming face.


They laugh and walk up the ramp, only to be ambushed by Kane!


The Cure to the Cancer chops Edge in the throat and chucks him down the ramp. As Christian goes to attack, Kane tosses a vicious fireball into Christian’s face.


As Christian rolls around the floor screaming in agony, patting the fire out on his face, Kane drops his arms the ring explodes with pyro.


Joey – Christ! If Christian lets that happen on Sunday the match is lost.


Mick – The match? Joey, if that happens on Sunday then some of Christian’s skin will be lost!



In his office, acting General Manager Daniel Bryan is watching EMT’s drop wet towels onto Christian’s face and laughing to himself, when suddenly he stops and his face get serious. He stares straight ahead at the man who just entered his office.



Undertaker – Daniel. I want a match. Tonight!


Daniel – Ok. No problem. How about…


On the TV, Edge is helping to get Christian to his feet.


Daniel – Edge?


The Undertaker smiles. It’s disturbing. Then he pulls the brim of his hat and walks away. Daniel breathes a sigh of relief and goes back to watching burnt Christian.


A video plays hyping Amazing Kong vs. Asuka for the Universal Women’s Title, the Wrestlemania Debut of both women.


Joey – Here’s another of those IC Title taster bouts set up by Daniel Bryan for tonight. The Intercontinental Champion, Bad News Barrett, against the Underdog from the Underground Sami Zayn.


In a superb match, Bad News Barrett defeated Sami Zayn in 12:29 by pinfall, illegally using the ropes for leverage.


Barrett barely has time to get his hand raised with Sami is up, getting in the champs face to winning by shady means.



Bully Bubba Ray charges down to the ring, and a fight kicks off obviously. The three men are soon joined in the ring by the rest of the ladder match; Damien Sandow and Big E Langston.


Before things can get too out of hand, here comes tonight’s GM…





Bryan – Boys, boys! Please! Save something for Wrestlemania why don’t you? I know what’s happening here. You’re all worked up, all shook up, all anxious because there are five men in that ring right now when there ought to be six.


The Traditional Intercontinental Ladder Match is a Wrestlemania staple, and it should be at least a six-man contest. With Rusev out though, things are looking uneven. But don’t worry. Despite the last minute nature of the problem, I’ve actually managed to find a replacement in the match.





The crowd go all the way out of their entire damn minds for the former NXT Champion Finn Balor.




Finn – See ya Sunday lads.


Joey – Well ladies and gentlemen it has been a MASSIVE Raw here tonight so far as we take our final steps on the road to Wrestlemania, and it’s about to get even bigger!



Joey – Edge doesn’t look up for this at all.


Regal – Neither would you Joey.


Joey – Ahead of his once in a lifetime match, career against career with Sting at Wrestlemania, The Undertaker tonight demanded some competition. Daniel Bryan gladly threw Edge under the bus.


Mick – These two have some brutal history. Taker ended Edge’s Wrestlemania Undefeated Streak several years back.


The Rated ECW Superstar is in the ring for a second, when the arena goes black.




The lights come back up and there he is. The Undertaker!



In a bout that had fantastic heat and good wrestling, Edge defeated The Undertaker in 15:42 when a botched interference from Goldust helped Edge hit the Spear in the corner, ramming Taker’s head into the turnbuckle.


Edge took advantage and pinned the Deadman with a handful of tights for the 1… 2.. 3!

Joey – Shit me! The Undertaker lost!


Mick – If this happens on Sunday, we have seen the last of The Phenom in WWE.


Regal – Either way Mick, we’re losing a legend. If Undertaker pins Sting, the Icon is done forever.


Taker is livid in the ring, and he smashes Goldust with a big boot. Edge tries to hit another Spear, but Taker dodges it. Christian runs in, face bandaged, and they go to work on Taker.



It’s Kane! Kane is here to help his brother!


The Brothers of Destruction start battering the fuck out of Edge and Christian. Goldust gets to his feet and joins the fight.



This is getting crazy.



The Intercontinental Champion!



Lethal is here for a measure of revenge on his former Cenation team mate! The ring is filling up fast here!



The European Champion is here tonight! What the hell?



We knew that was coming! Any chance Sami has had to get his hands on Rusev in recent weeks.


Finally Daniel Bryan makes his way to the ring and demands the fight be broken up or everyone is suspended, Wrestlemania be fucked!


The faces and heels separate and Daniel gets between them, but the crowd start kicking off some for reason.



Shit me! What’s he doing here! Daniel gave Cena the night off.


As soon as Bryan clocks Cena is goes for him, and the fight kicks back off.


Joey – Wrestlemania just arrived early and it’s kicking the shit out of itself!


Raw goes off air with the massive brawl still going on in and out of the ring.

Overall… 86



WHW Title Match
John Cena (c) v Daniel Bryan

Intercontinental Title Ladder Match

Bad News Barrett (c) v Sami Zayn v Big E Langston v Bully Bubba Ray v Damien Sandow v Finn Balor

European Title Fatal 5Way Elimination Match

Rusev (c) v Samoa Joe v Jey Fatu v Stixx v Jay Lethal

Universal Women’s Title Match

Amazing Kong (c) v Asuka

ECW Title House of Fun Match

Edge (c) v Goldust

Universal Tag Titles Match

reDragon (c) v Guerrillas of Destiny

Inferno Match

Kane v Christian

Falls Count Anywhere Match

Chris Jericho v Shelton Benjamin

Career v Career Match

The Icon Sting v The Undertaker


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s