Cole – “Ladies and gentleman welcome to the go home show for SmackDown Live as we career headfirst into the belly of WrestllllllllllllllllllllllllllleMaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaania!
“BOOM! BOOM! BOOM-BA-BOOM! BOOM!” The show starts with an impressive opening of pyro, before the lights are raised and several sections of the excited crowd are shown waving various signs. The focus then switches to the announce table where Michael Cole and JBL introduce tonight’s show and our two massive main events. John Morrison takes on Brock Lesnar, while Bray Wyatt and Erick Rowan face Antonio Cesaro and The Icon Sting in a steel cage!
And here we chuffing go.
The beast is ready for singles action! What a way to kick off Smackdown!
Ding ding ding.
Brock comes right out of gates. But, characteristically of both KO-MO members, they don’t just stand there and get suplexed. Morrison is quick with his blows, but everyone eventually falls into the arms of The Beast Incarnate….
1,2,3,4, Suplex’s are hit. Morrison goes groggy and this could all be over soon folks.
Alarmingly, there is no Kevin Owens to be found. I wonder where he could be? Anyway. Lesnar is laying into Morrison right now. He goes for the F5….
COUNTER. Morrison swings out of it. Moonlight drive????
But Brock see’s it coming! He’s been hit with a couple of those now. He anticipated it, grabbed Morrison by the throat, headbutted him to the referees horror. Then laid into him with closed fists.
In a superb match, John Morrison defeated Brock Lesnar in 8:55 when Brock Lesnar got disqualified after going into an attacking rage. Brock doesn’t lay in anymore than he has to to prove his point to Owens though. And leaves on his own accord…
Backstage after the break. Kevin is interviewed. He says that not being out there tonight was John’s idea. Morrison himself wanted to face Brock Lesnar tonight. His friend put on a valiant show. And on Sunday, Kevin Owens is going to KO-MO Lesnar for good.
Now here’s a man with a chip on his shoulder. Tyson Kidd is in the house after his brutal victory over Daniels last night on CWC.
In a bout that had sub-par wrestling and little heat, Tyson Kidd defeated Sin Cara in 7:24 by submission with a Dungeon Lock.
Post match, Tyson grabs the mic.
“Christopher Daniels. If you ever wake up from the state I put you in last night. Here my voice. I am sick and I am tired of people like you, like Sin Cara… Washed up has-beens and could-have-beens from a by-gone-era. I want you one more time. If your pride and your body allow it. But I want you for the last time….. I want you to leave the WWE for good, enabling my light to shine brighter than ever. I will be the man to clip The Angels Wings forever……….. When you decide to meet me in a loser leaves town match.
Back at the announce table. Cole and JBL announce that NWA Rumble contender Sheamus has REQUESTED. Yup. You read that right. He has requested a handicap match against Austin Aries and Hideo Itami tonight, after seeing what the Cruiserweights did to Randy Orton on CWC. You know what they say? The Irish love to fight…..
In a bout that had decent wrestling but didn’t have much heat, Austin Aries and Hideo Itami defeated Sheamus in 9:38 when Austin Aries defeated Sheamus by submission with a Last Chancery.
Graves – “Do you know what, Aries and Hideo have absolutely killed it against eachother, but they’re really not bad as a team!”
The Lone Wolf stands with his chest out in a dark room. He tells the WWE Universe to not worry about his absence too much. Because his loss to Sting at Elimination Chamber caused him to retreat and reassess. Lone Wolves are fine n all, but how many wolves do you really see working well by themselves?…… Wolves work best in a pack. And that is something that this lone wolf seeks to rectify.
We then pan to see United States Champion Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger confronting GM Jim Ross. Dolph is irate that as of this moment, he and Jack are STILL not on the WrestleMania card AT ALL. He says he’s the US Champ at that should automaticaly earn him a spot at the showcase of the immortals by right. JR disagrees and says that it’s actions as well as titles that earn you a spot at WrestleMania… And Frankly. Dolphs a prick. So he actually takes pleasure in saying this….
JR – “Dolph Ziggler, and by extension Jack Swagger. You will not be needed at WrestleMania. Take the night off.”
Dolph doesn’t flip. He Snarls.
Dolph – “We’re going to Burn WrestleMania to the ground……”
And just like that, out they come. Both Ziggler and Jack make their way to the ring and tell the WWE Universe not to expect much on Sunday because frankly, it’s a nothing card without them booked. But booking doesn’t matter… Because you know all those moments everyone is looking forward to? Those massive spots that you’re dying to witness. Well they’re not going to happen. AmericA will make sure of that…
They are interrupted by the charismatic duo of Fandango and Joe Hennig. AmericA’s perennial thorns in the side. Both men are wearing elaborate WrestleMania jerseys…
Cole – “Has JR enlisted PP to stop Ziggler and Swagger interfering at WrestleMania?”
Both men rush into the ring, but after all is said and done it’s Ziggler and Swagger who stand tall. They have the high ground and make it count. With both Fandango and Hennig grounded. Swagger holds each man up one at a time for Ziggler to crack them over the head with the United States Championship……
AmericA are here to stay. And as they said earlier, they aim to burn WrestleMania down.
A video plays hyping the Cruiserweight Championship match Kota Ibushi vs. Adrian Neville.
Back to the ring and just look at what we have set up………..
The Shield are here, lead this week by Dean Ambrose, as this week they’re walking into The Ambrose Asylum! And look! Mitch is back!
Reincarnated from the dead.
The Shield stand in the ring. Dominating. Imposing. Proud of the beat down and systematic destruction they laid out on The Bullet Club last week. They’re the guests for tonight’s episode of The Ambrose Asylum, but we can’t get to introducing them as no-one in the ring can get a word in edgeways because the crowd won’t let them. It’s the fucking Shield. Dean Ambrose wants to announce his guest. But…. He can’t. Chants change from “Shield” to “A-POS-TLE”. In the end Dean just says “Screw it”. And signals out for his scheduled guests…
NWA World HeavyWeight World Champion Randy Orton! He’s not the booked guest!
Out Orton Comes and all four men stand around comparing the sizes of eachothers dicks. Orton says that a lot has been made of this dream Shield V Bullet Club match, but it will infact be The NWA Rumble match that steals the show. This leads to the Shield “pffffft-ing” him, and then a promise that there will only be one match that steals the sho….
Then the Ring gets stacked when Cruiserweight Champion Kota Ibushi comes out, and says that if he thinks that that’s the case, then they will all be sorely disappointed when Kota Ibushi dances around everyone in Orlando and gets a Meltzer 5 star. Special..
This leads Neville to poke out his head…. He briefly cuts a menacing stance, before he to is interrupted….
The crowd go fucking bananas because The Bullet Club in it’s Entirety arrive on scene. Rhodes, Styles, Gallows, and Anderson. All of whom have vested interests with each of the men already out here in someway…
AJ – “I’ll give it to ya, last week. You laid the beat down on us. You really did. I was limping for three days after that Triple Powerbomb. I’m almost inclined to congratulate you. We saw The Shield at it’s best! FINALLY! You see I was legitimately worried that you guys just wouldn’t show up at WrestleMania. But here you are. Proud. Defiant. Headstrong. Exactly how we want you to be. Because in three days, we will exterminate the Ambrose, Rollins and Reigns plague from the WWE. The WWE Tag titles define the top faction in this industry. And we will leave WrestleMania with them still around our waists. But just as importantly, like all that have got in the way of THE BULLET CLUB before, you will fall.”
Battle lines are drawn up, the crowd want blood…………… Are we going to really wait until WrestleMania for conflict?
Of course not.
The Club look to Neville and all 5 men rush into the ring. The Asylum set up gets destroyed immediately as limbs crash around. Rhodes, Orton, Anderson and Reigns all fall to the outside. Rollins cracks Gallows with a mean looking knee strike, but then turns into AJ who hits the Pele. Kota shakes off Neville and germans AJ clear across the ring, but turns into Neville who dispatches the Cruiserweight Champ with a T Bone. He snarls and poses but turns into Ambrose, Dirty Deeds!
Ambrose looks around. He identifies AJ coming to his senses in the corner……
He sees his plant, still potted and primed. He looks to the crowd who egg him on…. Is this going to be the end of Mitch #2? He aims… He motions!
CROSS RHODES! Cody saves AJ!
And then an RKO from Orton to one of his main challengers to the NWA Championship at WrestleMania!
It’s Orton who stands tall in the ring amongst the carnage. His theme plays, but then gets cut off…….. The tron goes dark….
The three emblems of wrestlings other top promotions appear, followed by the caption. “We’re coming for you Randy.”
Good luck on Sunday Randy, You’re going to need it.
Backstage, Cesaro is changing and getting ready for the main event. In comes his partner for the night, Sting. Both men shake hands, and Cesaro says that while he appreciates the sentiment of Stings offer of help, he thinks The Icon should reconsider. Bray Wyatt is like nothing this company has ever seen, and really, Sting needs to be in the best shape he can be in going into WrestleMania.
Sting says to worry about himself, because he’s fucking Sting. And Sting does what Sting does better than no-one else. Not Bray Wyatt, not Cesaro, and certainly not The Undertaker.
In a superb match…………….
Originally, No-one attempted to escape the cage. That defeats the point for these men. Bray Wyatt and Erick Rowan wanted to inflict pain, and Cesaro and Sting had personal points to prove…
Pain infliction was certainly dealt by The Wyatts, with Sting baring the brunt of the storm. The legend was shown no respect and quickly became a target for the younger Wyatts. His famous face paint eventually smeared across his face after Rowan grinds it away, using the satanic structure as a tool.
Bray asks for the door to be opened. They look to actually send Sting out of the cell, leaving only Cesaro inside, rendering the match effectively a handicap one. Sting is hung up on the ropes but manages to pull Rowan out with him! Both men are out of this match! The cell is locked shut, leaving just Bray and Cesaro inside!
Bray is flustered. He’s a master manipulator and strategist. This was not his game plan and now he has to adapt, something he doesn’t like to do. Rowan is equally flustered on the outside. He’s trying to get back into the cage to help his master, but the referee says “no way dude!”. Rowan then blasts the official and takes the key by force. He grabs a chair and just gets the door open enough to slide it into the ring before Sting splashes Rowan into the canvas! Both men brawl around the outside of the ring while Bray sizes up Cesaro with the chair. He swings!
Cesaro ducks and catches the chair. Then blasts the WWE champion with it himself! Bray Wyatt is down! Antonio climbs the cage!….. He gets to the top but Rowan has temporarily downed Sting on the outside. Cesaro can’t fall down! He looks back at Bray Wyatt who is tentatively getting back up to his feet! The crowd are egging him on to jump. He considers all the options but it’s fairly clear there’s only one worth taking!
DIVING CROSS BODY ONTO BRAY WYATT. AND WHAT? CESARO HAS ROLLED THROUGH. He never let go of his grip!
Graves – OH MY GOD! NEUTRALIZER!!! Is there anything this man can’t do?”
Cole – “ANTONIO CESARO HAS DONE IT!”
JBL – ” He’s pinned Bray Wyatt! I can’t even remember the last time Bray got pinned!”
Antonio Cesaro and Sting defeated Bray Wyatt and Erick Rowan in 14:01 when Antonio Cesaro defeated Bray Wyatt by pinfall with The Neutralizer.
Graves – “No more. Please. I’m actioned out!”
It’s The Undertaker!
The Cage rises and Bray and Cesaro leave the state of play. Stood in the middle of the ring is The Undertaker, here in person on SmackDown Live! He stares at Sting in the ring who stares back. The crowd go mental…..
Both men don’t come to blows. Why would they? The look to the WrestleMania sign, where they meet for the first and the only time. There can be only one, and one of these legends will retire at The Showcase of the Immortals.